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It all started when X feminists decided to bash Jemima Osunde on a tweet she made. She was bashed for willing to change her surname when she gets married. I did not see anything wrong in it until feminists said she was accepting the “patriarchal system” of the society- that feminists who change their surname to their husband’s when they get married are choice feminists. It felt like a small issue until X feminists created a X space to talk about “Choice feminism“.
Photo Credit: X
The concept was insightful and struck me by surprise, for someone who has identified with the concept, feminism, I discovered I was not meeting the supposed standards. I am willing to change my surname to my future husband’s own not just because I’m accepting the patriarchal system but because it is a means of identification. Marriage is a union of merging. In the cultural system ,the man takes a wife to become one with her, establishing a family. The new family can create a new surname, one for identification or by norms, identify with the husband’s family name. This is just to make tracing of the family lineage easier.
I, for one do not think changing surnames is you accepting the patriarchy system. When you accept a man’s proposal, you know you’ve got to identify with him as one, no big deal!
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What has been said against choice feminism
“Choice feminism”, the shadowy remnant of the original movement, tells women that their choices, everyone’s choices, the incredibly constrained “choices” they made, are good choices.” – Linda Hirshman, Get to Work: A Manifesto for Women of the World (2006).
One argument against choice feminism is that not all women have the ability to choose their feminism lifestyle. Choice feminism is seen as subtle because people who practice this accept the dictates of the patriarchy society by choice- because they can either choose to or not. Feminists in acceptable society thrive more than those who are in societies that frowns against the concept.
“Choice feminismās fatal flaw lies within its name: the assumption that choice is a liberty that everyone has.” – The F-Word Magazine.
Another argument against choice feminism is that it is individualistic because not all women are in the liberty to choose what they want. A school of thought believe that all feminists should practice feminism that is generally acceptable. They argue feminists should pose a united front in the fight against patriarchal dominance.
Thoughts for choice feminism
“Choice feminism is a critical term for expressions of feminism that emphasize womenās freedom of choice.”
Everyone has the freedom to choose whatever pays them best. You can choose what aspect of feminism you want to reckon with. The fact you’re able to choose is a good start for your feminism to be able to thrive. Some feminists say it’s the engaging forms of feminism that created the avenue for choice freedom.
You have got the right to choose what works for you- whether you decide to be a housewife or a career woman as a feminist is left to you. Your views and opinions are you choice as long as they don’t adhere to the dictates of patriarchy by compulsion.
In this sense, I don’t think Jemima Osunde is less of a feminist if at all she identifies as one because she wishes to bear her husband’s surname. It is her choice, no one is imposing it on her. The way forward is rallying support for women who don’t have the right exercise their basic women’s rights and not turn on one another.
The goal of feminism is not women turning against one another but uplifting ourselves to have that zeal to speak out in all situations. Menial issues should not drive us apart. Let us focus on the ultimate goal-a society where every woman has the right to choose what she wants for herself.
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