Wednesday, 13 November, 2024

Debunking the myths about Cross River: My experiences as a corps member


National Youth Service Corps (NYSC)

Estimated reading time: 4 minutes

As an ex-serviceman of the National Youth Service Corps (NYSC), I spent a year in Cross River State in faithful service to my Fatherland, where I was posted to a town outside the capital, Calabar. Now back home, everyoneā€™s curious about how my service year went in Calabar, although, ironically, I wasnā€™t actually based in the state capital. But in most peopleā€™s minds, Cross River is Calabarā€”whether youā€™re stationed in Ikom, Boki, Biase, Ogoja, Etung, or anywhere else. Calabar is like the shorthand that defines the entire state.

One thing people always ask me is, ā€œHow are the women?ā€ This question often comes with a smirk or a knowing look, thanks to a stereotype thatā€™s spread across Nigeria: the belief that “Calabar women” are particularly sexually assertive or have an unusually high sexual energy. The second question, perhaps even more outrageous, is: ā€œDo they still eat humans?ā€ It’s as if some outdated and fictional portrayal of Cross River people still colours our view of them. Yes, this odd, outdated assumption about cannibalism in the area is still floating around.

Addressing the stereotypes about Calabar women

Letā€™s start with the stereotype about Calabar women. Thereā€™s a common belief in Nigeria that women from Calabar (or Cross River more broadly) are more interested in or enthusiastic about sex than women from other parts of the country. Some even go as far as to say that they are somehow ā€œinsatiableā€ or that being with them is an experience unlike any other.

This notion, however, is deeply flawed and, frankly, insulting. It reflects a stereotype that borders on prejudice. Yes, many women in Calabar may be more open about their desires and might seem more assertive in pursuing what they want. But this doesnā€™t make them nymphomaniacs. In reality, people everywhere have their unique ways of expressing themselves and their preferences, and itā€™s unfair and limiting to label one group as inherently more promiscuous or ā€œwildā€ based on such superficial perceptions.

In my experience, the women I met in Cross River are like women everywhere elseā€”individuals with a wide range of personalities, preferences, and life goals. To claim otherwise, or to imply that women from this region are somehow ā€œdifferentā€ in this way, shows a lack of understanding and respect. In fact, many other cultures in Nigeria may engage in similar behaviors; they just donā€™t talk about it openly, making Cross Riverā€™s openness seem distinct. But openness should never be confused with promiscuity or promiscuity assumed to be universal.

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Breaking the cannibalism myth

Now, the second question I hear is even more baffling. Some people, influenced by outdated stories, ask if the people in Cross River are still cannibals. Historically, itā€™s true that some form of cannibalism existed centuries ago in certain towns, specifically in Ugep, a town in Cross River. But thatā€™s a distant piece of history, and to assume itā€™s part of todayā€™s culture is to ignore how societies evolve and grow.

The Cross River people are some of the warmest, friendliest, and most welcoming people I have ever met. I can confidently say that their hospitality rivals any I have experienced in almost three decades of my existence. The myth of cannibalism is outdated and unfounded, based on an ancient practice long abandoned and condemned by the very people who now bear the brunt of this stereotype. The Cross Riverians I met were genuine, accommodating, and eager to share their cultureā€”not the type to hold onto a savage past. Besides, they are proud of their cultural heritage, which includes rich traditions, cuisine, and festivals, none of which involve anything remotely close to what these stories suggest.

The danger of spreading misconceptions

These stereotypes donā€™t just hurt the people of Cross River; they also show a lack of willingness to see beyond oneā€™s assumptions. When people ask me about these two stereotypesā€”womenā€™s sexual behavior and cannibalismā€”they reveal their own ignorance rather than any truths about Cross River. Spreading falsehoods or exaggerations about any culture only fuels discrimination and division, creating unnecessary distance between communities that could otherwise be connected by mutual respect.

So, next time someone mentions Calabar or the Cross River people, letā€™s drop the tired stereotypes. Cross Riverians deserve to be known for their real qualitiesā€”openness, warmth, and friendliness. Ignorance might make a good story for some, but truth brings people closer.


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