Are unexpected WhatsApp video calls truly intrusive to one’s privacy?

Estimated reading time: 4 minutes

I’ve always been someone who values boundaries when it comes to my phone. Working remotely means constant distractions, so I keep my phone on Do Not Disturb most of the time. Still, my data is always on, and my phone is connected to my MiFi, so WhatsApp calls—whether voice or video—are fair game. However, I’m the one who decides whether to pick up or not. That autonomy is key, and it’s something I think many people misunderstand when it comes to social media and digital boundaries.

Etiquette 101.

Before making a WhatsApp video call, ask in advance if it’s okay to!

— Duke of Gatanga (@dnkariuki) December 5, 2024

This brings me to this idea I keep seeing online: some people claim that calling someone on a video call through WhatsApp is too private, as if it crosses an unspoken boundary. This logic always baffles me. WhatsApp is not Twitter or Instagram, where you broadcast to the public. To me, it’s a private platform. When you hand over your phone number to someone, you’re already granting them access to a piece of your personal space. The idea that calling on WhatsApp—whether voice or video—suddenly breaches some sacred threshold feels exaggerated.

Take a step back and think about the mechanics of it. A WhatsApp video call is not inherently different from a voice call, whether online or through a regular carrier. The primary difference is the medium—data versus network airtime—but the intention is the same: to communicate directly and in real time. If anything, the affordability and convenience of online calls have revolutionized the way we stay connected. In many cases, they’ve become lifelines for maintaining relationships, especially across long distances. So why the unnecessary stigma?

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Breaking free from old patterns

What’s really happening here is a clash between outdated social norms and evolving technology. There’s this lingering mindset that views phone calls—especially video calls—as intrusive. But these are tools designed for connection, not disruption. If someone video-calls you, it’s not an invasion; it’s a request. You retain the power to decline, reschedule, or text back instead. The problem isn’t the medium of communication; it’s our inability to manage our boundaries without demonizing the technology itself.

This brings me to the broader issue: the way society clings to old dogmas about personal interaction, especially in the digital age. Why are some people so quick to shame others for using tools like WhatsApp video calls when they’re perfectly within their rights to reject or accept those calls? It’s as though some individuals would rather police others’ behavior than assert their own boundaries. It’s time we stopped projecting our discomfort onto others and learned to embrace individual differences.

Respecting individual preferences

Here’s the thing: everyone has a different comfort level with communication. For me, WhatsApp calls are a norm because they’re practical and efficient. For someone else, they might feel invasive. Both perspectives are valid—but they shouldn’t cancel each other out. The key lies in understanding and respecting those differences without resorting to sweeping generalizations. If you’re uncomfortable with video calls, communicate that politely instead of criticizing people who find them normal.

Well, this is another nuanced angle, and you're right. But I guess we should call the act of random WhatsApp audio call as perfectly normal in a situation where data isn't turned off at all 24/7 from the receiving end.

— Francis Ikuerowo (@francisikuerowo) October 21, 2024

Similarly, let’s not forget that digital platforms exist to make life easier, not harder. Shunning WhatsApp calls because of an arbitrary boundary contradicts the very purpose of the platform. What’s worse, it creates unnecessary tension in relationships that could otherwise thrive on open communication. Instead of clinging to rigid ideas of privacy, we should focus on flexibility and dialogue.

Finally, I must mention that we live in an era where technology has blurred the lines between private and public spaces. This can be overwhelming, but it also offers incredible opportunities for connection. Instead of letting outdated notions dictate how we use these tools, we should adapt to the times and embrace the flexibility they offer.

So, the next time someone video-calls you on WhatsApp, remember: it’s not an invasion—it’s an invitation. You’re in control of whether to accept, decline, or suggest an alternative. Let’s stop shaming people for how they connect and start focusing on what truly matters—how we communicate and understand each other in a rapidly changing world. After all, connection isn’t the enemy. Misunderstanding is.