Everyone looks forward to a first date with excitement, but they don’t always pay attention to some red flags that can spell trouble for them if and when they eventually get into a relationship with the other person.
Red flags are warning signs that indicate unhealthy or manipulative behavior. They are not always recognizable at first — which is part of what makes them so dangerous. However, they tend to grow bigger and become more problematic over time.
Here are some red flags to look out for on a first date, and if ignored, they can be unhealthy for you in the long run.
1. Verbal abuse
Verbal abuse, also known as emotional abuse, is a range of words or behaviors used to manipulate, intimidate, and maintain power and control over someone. These include insults, humiliation and ridicule, the silent treatment, and attempts to scare, isolate, and control.
The moment he or she begins to comment on how you look, the type of hair you make, and how slim or fat you are, it is a red flag that this person doesn’t even want you for who you are.
2. How they talk about their exes
When asked about their ex(es) and why they broke up with them, they begin to talk so poorly and badly of them. They comment on how nothing good came out of the relationship, and how lazy, dishonest, poor, controlling, manipulative, hopeless their ex(es) were.
If they can talk so shabbily of their ex(es) and NEVER hint on one good thing about them or where they themselves went wrong, this is a red flag. Because it takes two to tango.
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3. You should come to my house later
This is a subtle invitation to a sexual affair. Inviting someone to come over to your house during or after a first date for whatever reason is a red flag.
It can only show one thing: their desire to just get you in bed. Because there should be a room to know each other more before committing to visiting at their homes.
4. Excessive sexual comments
When they start making excessive sexual comments about your lips, breasts, hips, and other parts of your body, this is a red flag and is suggestive of their only interested in your body and wanting to just casually sleep with you.
5. Their disposition to marriage and family
You should watch how they talk about marriage, other men or women, their families, successful or failed marriages in the society.
For instance, if he believes that women are only meant for the kitchen or she believes that men should be the sole providers, this is a red flag. And as women, I think there are some pertinent questions to ask before saying I do.
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